Matters of the Heart #6 Building a Tender Heart

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Discover how building a tender heart through daily time with God releases compassion, renews strength, and positions you for greater miracles in every area of life.

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Tender Heart Overview

In this sixth installment of the Matters of the Heart series, the pastor explores what it truly means to build and maintain a tender heart before God. Drawing on the historical account of the Christmas truce during World War One, the message opens with a striking image of how Christ’s presence alone can bring peace into the fiercest conflicts. The sermon anchors itself in Jeremiah 17:5-8, contrasting the person who trusts in human strength and ends up like a shrub in the desert with the one who trusts in God and flourishes like a tree planted by the river. Through a detailed study of Mark 6 and Mark 8, the pastor traces how the disciples’ compassion toward the multitudes diminished when they neglected time alone with Jesus, resulting in a smaller miracle the second time around. The lesson is clear: spending daily, intimate time with the Lord softens the heart, releases compassion, and positions believers to receive and distribute God’s miraculous provision. Isaiah 40:28-31 and the story of Mary and Martha in Luke 10 round out the message, calling every listener to choose the good part and wait on the Lord before anything else.

Tender Heart Outline

  • 0:00 – Series Introduction and the Christmas Truce: The pastor opens the sixth message in the Matters of the Heart series, using the famous World War One Christmas truce as an illustration of how Christ’s presence alone creates peace and softens the hardest hearts.
  • 7:30 – Jesus Enters Time to Fight a Tender War: A theological reflection on the Incarnation: Jesus left glory, entered a corrupted world, and fought the battle of faith with a love never before seen by mankind, keeping a pure and tender heart toward both the Father and humanity.
  • 16:00 – Israel’s Hard Heart in the Wilderness: The pastor draws a parallel between Israel’s inability to receive God’s miracles after four hundred years of slavery and believers today who, though born again, struggle to fully trust God because old hardness of heart persists.
  • 24:30 – Jeremiah 17 and the Two Trees: A careful reading of Jeremiah 17:5-8 establishes the sermon’s doctrinal foundation, contrasting the cursed man who trusts in flesh with the blessed man whose hope is in the Lord and who yields fruit even in drought.
  • 34:00 – Mark 6 and the Feeding of Five Thousand: The disciples, refreshed after time alone with Jesus on the water, are moved with compassion and witness the miracle of five loaves and two fish feeding approximately fifteen to twenty thousand people with twelve baskets left over.
  • 43:00 – Mark 8 and the Feeding of Four Thousand: After days of toiling and straining at the oars without rest in the Lord, the disciples lose their compassion. Jesus must prompt them to feed the crowd, and the second miracle, though real, produces less with more starting resources.
  • 50:00 – Isaiah 40 and Waiting on the Lord: The pastor unpacks the Hebrew word kava, meaning to intertwine like strands of a rope, showing that waiting on the Lord is an active, intimate gathering of oneself into God’s presence where strength is renewed and hearts are kept tender.
  • 56:30 – Mary and Martha and the One Necessary Thing: Luke 10:38-42 closes the sermon with a practical call: like Mary, believers must choose the good part first, spending time at the feet of Jesus before the demands of life crowd out the one thing that cannot be taken away.

Scripture References

Jeremiah 17:5-6, Jeremiah 17:7-8, 1 Timothy 6:12, Mark 6:30-44, Mark 6:45-52, Mark 8:1-9, Mark 9, Isaiah 40:28-31, Luke 10:38-42

Key Takeaways

  • A tender heart toward God is not a personality trait but a daily discipline cultivated through intimate, unhurried time in His presence.
  • The contrast between the two miraculous feedings in Mark 6 and Mark 8 reveals that when believers neglect communion with God, compassion diminishes and the miraculous decreases even when natural resources increase.
  • Waiting on the Lord, from the Hebrew word kava meaning to intertwine, is an active gathering of your whole being into God’s presence, not passive inactivity.
  • Trusting in human strength rather than God causes a person to become like a shrub in the desert, unable to see or receive the good God sends, as Jeremiah 17:5-6 declares.
  • Compassion toward others is the overflow of a heart softened by time with the Father, and without it believers operate in their own toil rather than God’s miraculous provision.
  • Mary’s choice to sit at Jesus’ feet before serving is the model for every believer: the good part, time with God, must come first, because everything else in life is subject to being taken away.
  • God gives power specifically to the weak and those with no might, making spiritual weakness a qualification for divine strength when the heart remains tender and waiting.

Tender Heart Notes

The Tender Heart as Spiritual Foundation

The central teaching of this message is that the condition of the believer’s heart determines the measure of God’s miraculous activity in their life. The pastor argues that just as Jesus maintained a tender heart toward the Father throughout thirty-three years of earthly conflict, so believers must guard and cultivate the same tenderness. Jeremiah 17:7-8 supplies the doctrinal backbone: the person whose hope is in the Lord becomes like a tree with roots deep in the river, producing fruit even in seasons of drought. Hardness of heart, by contrast, blinds a person to the good God is already sending and reduces them to striving in their own strength.

Two Feedings, Two Conditions, One Lesson

The most striking biblical illustration in this sermon is the side-by-side comparison of the two miraculous feedings in Mark 6 and Mark 8. In the first account the disciples had just rested with Jesus on the water for an extended period, and their hearts were compassionate toward the multitude. Beginning with only five loaves and two fish, they participated in feeding an estimated fifteen to twenty thousand people and gathered twelve baskets of fragments. In the second account, exhausted from toiling against contrary winds and having neglected time with the Lord, they showed no compassion until Jesus prompted them. Starting with more food, they fed fewer people and collected only seven baskets. The difference was not the resources available but the condition of the heart.

Waiting on God Is Active Intertwining

Many believers misunderstand waiting on the Lord as passive resignation or simple inactivity. The pastor corrects this by tracing the Hebrew word kava in Isaiah 40:31, which literally means to intertwine, as strands wound together into a rope that cannot be broken. It also appears in Genesis 1:9 to describe the gathering of waters into one place. Waiting on God therefore means drawing near, gathering yourself entirely into His presence, and allowing His life to weave through yours. This kind of waiting renews strength, softens the heart, develops compassion, and positions the believer to operate under God’s power rather than their own diminishing reserves.

Compassion Flows From the Father’s Presence

A recurring theme throughout the message is the direct connection between time spent with God and the capacity to feel and act in compassion toward others. The pastor illustrates this through the ministry’s thirty-five-year food program, noting that critics often ask whether recipients are taking advantage of the church. The response, rooted in God’s directive to feed people regardless of their circumstances, reflects the compassion that flows naturally from a heart kept tender through regular communion with the Lord. When that communion is neglected, as with the disciples in Mark 8, even believers who have witnessed miracles can become self-focused and indifferent to the needs around them.

Choose the Good Part Before All Else

The sermon closes with the account of Mary and Martha in Luke 10:38-42 as a practical model for building a tender heart. Martha was distracted by legitimate service while Mary sat at Jesus’ feet. Jesus’ response was not a rebuke of work but a declaration of priority: one thing is needed, and Mary chose it. The pastor applies this directly, urging believers to give God the first portion of each day before the demands of work, family, and ministry consume their attention. Jobs, homes, and relationships can all be taken away, but the transforming presence of God experienced in daily time with Him is the one thing that cannot.

Practical Steps Toward a Tender Heart

Throughout the message the pastor offers concrete, accessible practices for maintaining heart tenderness. These include setting aside daily time alone with God before the day begins, reading Scripture not as a literary exercise but as a living conversation, asking God to speak personally through His Word, worshiping until the stillness of His presence settles in, and choosing to remember and declare the miracles already received. The example of David before Goliath underscores remembrance as a weapon: by recalling how God delivered the lion and the bear, David’s heart remained bold and tender toward divine possibility rather than shrinking before human-scale impossibility.

Frequently Asked Questions

What does it mean to have a tender heart toward God?

Having a tender heart toward God means remaining open, responsive, and trusting toward Him rather than relying on human strength or self-sufficiency. Jeremiah 17:7-8 describes this person as a tree planted by the river whose leaves stay green even in drought. It is cultivated through daily time in God’s presence, reading His Word as a living conversation, and choosing to remember His past faithfulness.

Why did the disciples show less compassion in the second miraculous feeding in Mark 8 than in Mark 6?

Between the two feedings the disciples had spent time toiling against contrary winds without rest in the Lord, which hardened their hearts and dulled their compassion. In Mark 6 they had recently been refreshed alone with Jesus, and compassion flowed naturally, resulting in a greater miracle with fewer starting resources. Mark 8 demonstrates that neglecting communion with God reduces both compassion and the measure of the miraculous, even when natural resources appear greater.

What does the Bible mean by waiting on the Lord in Isaiah 40:31?

The Hebrew word translated wait in Isaiah 40:31 is kava, meaning to intertwine or gather together as strands wound into a rope. Waiting on the Lord is therefore an active drawing near, a gathering of oneself entirely into God’s presence to be strengthened and renewed. It is not passive resignation but intentional communion that weaves God’s strength through the believer’s weakness.

What is the difference between the blessed and cursed person described in Jeremiah 17:5-8?

Jeremiah 17:5-6 describes the cursed person as one who trusts in human beings and makes flesh their strength, whose heart departs from God, ending up like a shrub in a salt wasteland unable to see when good comes. Verses 7-8 describe the blessed person as one whose hope is in the Lord, like a tree with roots reaching the river, producing fruit continuously and remaining unafraid even in times of drought and heat.

How does compassion connect to experiencing miracles in the Christian life?

The sermon draws directly from the two feeding miracles to show that compassion, which flows from a heart softened by time with God, is the condition in which the miraculous operates most powerfully. When the disciples were compassionate in Mark 6, a smaller supply fed more people and produced more surplus. Compassion is not merely an emotion but the outward evidence of a tender heart that trusts in God’s provision rather than calculating by human resources.

Why is it important to spend personal time with God each day rather than relying only on church attendance?

The pastor emphasizes that church attendance, while valuable, cannot substitute for personal, daily communion with God. Jesus Himself withdrew regularly to pray alone with the Father, and that time sustained His compassion and power throughout His earthly ministry. The disciples’ example in Mark 8 shows that even those who witness miracles and serve actively can lose heart tenderness and compassion when they neglect private time with God.

What does the story of Mary and Martha in Luke 10 teach about priorities?

Luke 10:38-42 teaches that sitting at the feet of Jesus, choosing intimate time with God before tasks and service, is the one necessary thing that cannot be taken away. Martha’s distraction with serving was not sinful in itself, but Jesus affirmed that Mary had chosen the better and more foundational part. The application is that believers who prioritize time with God first will find that all other responsibilities are better sustained by the strength and compassion that flows from His presence.

How can a believer keep their heart from growing hard over time?

The sermon identifies several practical means: spending daily time alone with God before the demands of the day begin, reading Scripture as a living word rather than a text, actively remembering and declaring past miracles as David did before Goliath, worshiping until God’s stillness settles in, and refusing to allow the striving and strains of life to crowd out communion with the Father. The key principle from Jeremiah 17 is that the heart stays tender when its roots are consistently drawing from God rather than from human systems and strength.